Yesterday was a little tough on the parenting front. Much of my time was occupied by busy work around the house. Later, I stripped my dad's tackle box and disappeared. I hit up the boat ramp in Chelmsford to see how everything worked and in a major display of irony actually fought a bass for thirty seconds using one of my spinners. First time I've hooked up in about a month.
In my absence, Olivia spent quality time with Papa. He arrived home yesterday morning.
Later in the day, it was suggested to me that one of the reasons I freeze up a little bit when Olivia comes home is that when she's at school, I go into work and productivity mode, and especially into art and writing mode. To shift from that back to intense focus on my parenting responsibilities is horrendous.
It was suggested to me that I observe my daughter, to learn about her, and to journal about my interaction with her either after she goes to bed or when she goes to school. This aligns my parenting responsibilities with my need to observe. When I go exploring (observing) just to notice things I haven't noticed before, I get a rush of creative energy. Observing Olivia will satisfy that part of me. It will also force me to stay in the moment with her.
I will journal, but I won't release my entries here. My interaction with Olivia is between Olivia and I. I will, however, report daily or semi-daily on whether or not I've done the journaling.
Still on my low carb diet by the way. Day 4. I've lost seven pounds so far.
See you on my new Facebook page! theintrovertexposedcs@gmail.com
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